well it's that time!!!

Hey guys, hope you're as excited as I am! I'm finally hitting the strip and doing it up, look for posts all weekend!

Let me get right to it with the itinerary.

Day one...Saturday

Arrive 5PM
Check in 6PM
Dinner at the burger bar at mandalay bay  7PM
Meet family and friends then explore the strip a little bit..
Turn in around midnight and sleep!

Day two - Sunday

Brunch at the Bellagio - 10AM
Explore the strip 11:30-5:30
Meet at the Hard Rock for dinner - 6
Cirque Du Solieleleateltjk - 9:30
Sleep - mindight

Day three - Monday
Game Worx - Noonish
explore the strip - 1:30 - 4:30
Dinner at Embers - 6PM
Head to fremont street - 7:30
Night club - 11:00PM

Day Four - Tuesday
BIG SPIN@#(*%@($#%*$#@(%(% - 10 AM location tbd
The rest...well we'll see!

Wed - leave.

Read more...

Open letter to the mickey d's worker

Dear Mcdonalds Worker,

I have the utmost respect for you.  When I was five I loved your restaurant so much that I would tell my mom how you were what I wanted to be when I grew up.  I lived my dream at the age of 19 for three months during college and while it wasn't all it was cracked up to be, I still felt I had accomplished something.

Many people say that working at Mickey D's is beneath them, but you and I both know sometimes we do what we have to to make ends meet.  I understand that sometimes working at this fast food giant seems a little mind numbing, but is it really that hard to understand my order?  You see, I HATE those big onions you put on your quarter pounders with cheese.  I love the little onions that you put on your double cheese burgers.  Today I wanted a quarter pounder with cheese with little onions.  I know there isn't a button on the cash register for that, but its not hard to manually type it in.  At the drive through, you seemed to have a little trouble understanding me, so I even repeated myself for you.  "One quarter pounder, no pickes, and the little onions instead of the big onions."  When it still seemed that you didn't understand, I even said it in spanish "pequito sequoias por favor".  On the screen my order still didn't have anything.  So one last time I checked "you know that I want small onions right?"  You replied with "yes and no pickles."  I felt that we had reached an understanding.  After waiting 5 minutes for my food to be ready, I was absolutely sure that it had taken so long because they were making my meal fresh and hot for me.  When I finally go to work, I opened my quarter pounder with cheese and took a big bite.  Guess what, BIG ONIONS.

Oh Mcdonalds worker, I thought we had bonded for during our brief rendezvous on the drive through intercom, but I have learned you're just like all the other women in my life.  You tell me what I want to hear, only to let me down in the end.

I know its hard to get people to change their ways, but I am begging you Mcdonalds worker, I don't want our relationship to end.  We have so much in common and you are living my old dream.  Please try to make things work with me.

Sincerely,

Me.

Read more...

troika music festival and Klausies Pizza.

For those of you who aren't familiar with it, the Troika music festival is a local music festival held in Durham, NC every year.  Not that I want to diss on this often awesome concert, but I wasn't as impressed with the music this year as I was last year (to be fair I was only able to attend one of the three nights this year). 

Maybe it was that it was really cold out, or that the music was too loud, but I just wasn't as impressed as I was with last years showing.  In my favorite venue of the festival, the Pinhook, one of the bands asked the sound guy to turn up the distortion.  If you're at all familiar with the Pinhook bar, it's pretty small as is and with the sound as loud as it was, the distortion made the music hardly recognizeable. 

Still though, I would recommend checking out the festival next year as the quality of the local music scene in the Raleigh/Durham/Chapel Hill area is unparralled in our country.

The real show stealer this year was Klausies Pizza, www.facebook.com/klausiespizza.   This delicious pizza is sold out of food truck and it distinctly says "3rd best pizza in the nation" on the side.  The owner was selling the pizza (I think he always does) and I asked him how they went about getting ranked as the 3rd best pizza in the nation.  HIs response thrilled me.

"That's totally fabricated, but it's an interesting story."

He went on to tell us that he had 4 friends together and they were eating the 4th best pizza in the country, they all agreed that Klausies Pizza was better, so the owner decided that must make his the 3rd best pizza in the country.  I was intrigued and decided to try a slice.  He cooked me a fresh slice and I have to say, this pizza was delicious.  I don't pretend to have eaten all of the best pizza in the country, but Klausies ranks up there.  Don't just take my word for it though, the pizza got it's name from the owners son (I think he's about 4).   He loved his fathers pizza so much that when the store opened, it was named after him.  There's no way a 4 year old can be wrong, they love all the best foods!

Read more...

Election coverage

I didn't vote yesterday.  Not because I'm a "bad" American, but because I'm a largely apathetic American.  It seems politicians want to keep spending, republicans and democrats alike...the tea party wants to spend less but for all the smaller government they want, they still are pro-life and anti-gay (how can you be for a smaller government if you still want to regulate those things?).  One thing is for sure, the American people want at least 2 more years of absolutely nothing getting done, why else would we have the democrats in control of the presidency, no one realllllly in control of the senate and the republicans in control of the house?!  It's because we want 2 more years of gridlock.  Makes sense, people hate change.

Read more...

Check out the epicness that is my halloween costume

Before looking at my halloween costume, go to the link below if you haven't seen the double rainbow video..

double Rainbow video


Erin and I went as the double rainbow this year!

You'll notice we go all the way across the sky...what does this mean?!

Read more...

What came next?

After Baltimore, I had a trip to Las Vegas, to take part in the World Series of Comedy. This was a contest that you register for and then they have events for those who don't advance in the contest. I didn't get to participate in the contest itself, but I was able to perform in a show in Las Vegas.

The show itself went pretty well, considering I had about an hour from the time my plane landed to get to the venue.

Upon arriving I was approached by a hooker who said "my name is Sandie..you can't spell that without SIN." Two things popped through my mind, #1 you also can't spell that without AIDS and #2 I wasn't paying her for a spelling lesson. Okay so that part didn't really happen, but a hooker did try to solicit me.

I made it to the show and got to perform last out of 17 comics, which meant there were about 16 people in the crowd. Keep that in mind when I post the video.

Among other things in Vegas, I gambled. Quite a bit. Considering I only lost a little bit of money, I consider it a win. I did at one point step out of a cab and split my jeans right down the crotch. I was walking around for about 15 minutes with this GIANT hole in my pants. I managed to talk a pit boss into giving me a comp for 100 bucks at the retail gift store at the Hard Rock. I went and used that + 50 dollars for a new pair of jeans. I am now the proud owner of the cheapest pair of jeans that the Hard Rock Casino sells...150 dollars.

I was only in Vegas for about three days, but it barely felt like a day. It was a whirlwind of excitement and I met some contacts in the comedy world. If you were in Vegas and I passed you one of my cards, feel free to drop a line in the comments.

If you want to have an awesome time in Vegas, get in touch with me. The big spin is happening in January!

Read more...

Boy has it been a while!

Why has it been so long you might ask? Well, I've been everywhere...literally. Atlanta, Baltimore, Vegas, DC, NYC, NJ,Philly, Knoxville, and back to DC. My travels are done until Thanksgiving when I'll be in Tampa.

Turns out posting from a cell phone is a lot harder than it would seem, even if you have a fancy phone like I do.

So that brings us to the here and now. I am going to, in the next few days, be blogging about my adventures. I had already blogged a little about Atlanta, so today, you will learn of my wonderful trip to Baltimore.

Ah yes, Baltimore...the city of Wonders. Mostly I found myself wondering why Baltimore was a city. I guess it was formed by people in Philly and DC wanting to move a little further out from their respective cities. What started as two suburbs is now it's own little place.

I went for business and had a blast. The second night I decided that I was going to be adventurous, mostly because the coworker I was hanging out with was exhausted and my one friend in the area was busy working. I decided to head out on my own and find a place to eat dinner. I decided I would drive for a while and find somewhere that looked interesting, that's when I stumbled upon the millstream inn.

I had found what I thought was a quaint little place to eat, somewhere that would give me a real flavor of Maryland. What I didn't know, but soon found out, was that the flavor of maryland was tits. Only I could mistakenly stumble into a strip club thinking it was a fancy eatery.

Then again, I feel like my family has always had strange happenings dealing with strip clubs.

Like the time my brother and I went to a strip club on Christmas eve. As we entered he said "shouldn't the girls be worried about the type of guy that comes in on Christmas eve? Aren't they mostly going to be murderers and rapists?" I told him that "the girls don't need to worry, they're already dead...on the inside".

We had a quick chuckle as we entered. Today was also half price lap dance night. My brothers friend ordered a lap dance and went to the back room. He came back 30 minutes later and we gave him a little shit for having been back there so long, secretely thinking he'd probably done something naughty with the girl in the back.

When we asked how it was, he frowned. "I just paid for 7 songs worth of lap dances so this girl could tell me about how she had been kicked out of her house, had surgery to help with her scoliosis and now had metal rods implanted inside of her". Clearly this wasn't the rod he had wanted implanted inside of her, but the only thing that could pop to my mind was "so, you just paid her nearly 100 bucks for HER to have a therapy session?"

I guess the moral of the story is stay away from strip clubs on Christmas eve. I feel like that's a moral most people already know, but we had to learn the hard way.

Read more...